The Carousel
Look! Everyone is in line waiting to get on that enchanting ride in the middle of the park. It’s a beautiful carousel and I want to get on it too.
As it spins around and around, I spot the horse I want from my spot in line. Full blonde mane and sky blue saddle, I can’t wait to ride her - I am so excited.
When it's my time to board the ride, my insides are filled with butterflies. When the gate opens, I run as fast as I can in the direction of my horse. I know exactly what I want. As I climb up I gain a new appreciation for details such as her pink braided bridal and her sparkling green eyes.
I follow the rules of the carousel. I wrap the soft leather buckle around my waist, and I stay seated with both my hands holding on a bronze pole.
When the ride springs to life I am filled with curiosity and wonder. As we pick up speed, I relish the warm breeze on my face and the gentle rhythm of the measured gallop. I am in communion with the other riders and horses - all going in the same direction. I am content and joyful.
After many times around, this sweet, safe and predictable ride starts to lose its luster and becomes a bit boring. I start to break a few rules, put my hands above my head to raise the risk factor, and try sitting side saddle and backwards to change my perspective. That works for a little while, but the feelings of restlessness are strong and become difficult to ignore. Could it be time to get off the ride?
Wait - but what if the next ride is worse? It could make me feel sick, terrified, or maybe even pee my pants. Or what if I get off this ride and get lost trying to find the next one? I look around at other riders, they all look happy. Maybe I should be? Maybe I could be? Maybe I should stay on this ride just a little longer. I’ve got it good here on this horse, even though her green eyes have lost some of her sparkle and this seat belt is a little tighter than it was when I first got on.
It eventually becomes clear that the joy is missing from this ride, and am I longing to feel joy again. So I summon the courage to disembark and try something new.
I jump.
I look back at the carousel. From this point of view I can clearly see that I was going nowhere on that ride. I know I made the right choice. Even though I am unsure what to ride next, I am certain there is a seat open and waiting just for me.
Matty May loves a carnival, and still teases her sister for peeing her pants on the Tidal Wave at Great America in the early 80s. If you would like a coach to help you get off your personal merry go round, start a conversation with Matty.