THE REASON
Life can be wonderful. The easy breezy days where everything falls into place, we believe all roads lead to the exact spot in which we stand and it all makes perfect sense.
Life can also be difficult. The exhausting days, when traveling through the darkest parts of the tunnel, we throw our heads back and say “Why do I even bother?”
Yet how often do we take the time to actually answer that question for ourselves? Why do we do what we do? What is the reason?
The answer can take you simultaneously back to the beginning and also give you a glimpse of your finish line. It realigns you with your purpose, your original intention, and that can bring you back on track to bring renewed strength to see yourself through.
Recalling your why is not enough, because sometimes our reasoning may have been built on thinking which we have long outgrown. So after you ask yourself why, it is just as important to challenge the answer with more thoughtful questions such as, “Well, how much sense does that make?” or “Is that a good enough reason?”
Sometimes you can feel in your heart ♥️ that your purpose is right on target; it can be that simple and pure. Other times this follow up question can shed light on a reason that is based in fear, guilt, or an outdated perspective that no longer serves you. When this happens, I encourage you to sit with that new awareness for a bit. When ready, redefine a reason that you are truly connected with; one that comes from your heart that you discover with your eyes wide open. I promise you, it will not be time wasted.
Here are a few examples of this process in action:
Parenting: The reasoning behind the classic, “This hurts me more than it hurts you” usually leads to it is what is best for the child. But what if your “why” isn’t really for the good of your child? What if you are blindly following rules that may have worked for your parents raising you, but might not be right for parenting your child. Perhaps it’s time to give yourself permission to do things differently.
Health: We are all so very tired of missing out on living due to being boxed in by Covid rules and regulations. When you stop and ask, “Why am I sacrificing so much?” you are reminded of the purpose behind the pain, which is to protect those you love. This doesn’t take away the longing for all you are missing, but it can remove some of the anger and judgement.
Volunteering: If you are a service-oriented, yes-person with big dreams you can quickly become buried under promises you made. So we ask ourselves, “This is volunteer work, I don’t have to do this. So then why do I?” If reasons such as, “It’s for the kids” or “To see the change we need in this country.” (Stacey Abrams I’m looking at you!) are truly enough to re-energize you, then you are right where you are supposed to be. But if the answer is something like, “Because I can’t say no”, dig a little deeper. “Is it out of guilt? Is it less about helping and more about pleasing?” This understanding can give you the courage to set some new boundaries to achieve a healthier balance in your life.
Perhaps you’ve never ever asked yourself, or thought about why you do the things you do. You don’t have to wait until the bad days to explore your daily intentions. When you take the time to reorient yourself with the purpose for your actions, you will be making the most of your precious time. Intentional living brings fulfillment, contentment, joy, and more of those easy breezy days.
The song The Reason is stuck on loop in Matty’s head. If you have any clue what Hoobastank means, please message Matty here (she’s long wondered).
